Maureen's Journey

What is your sober date?

12/11/2018 My life is imperfect but I see it as a way for me to change how I view it. Instead of the number of people in my life it's the quality of the people in it. Instead of whining about how little I have financially it's taught me to be smarter about how and what I purchase. Instead of thinking the problem is external and can be resolved by window dressing it , I've looked at where internally my life is empty. I don't compare my life to others and what they have and I don't. This is the one time as little as I have my life feels very rich.

How did addiction keep you from living your best life?

I wasn't living I was existing. I existed in states of either anger and bitterness which fueled my drinking to life of hangovers and black outs. Of using Google maps to figure out how I got home or where the hell I went. Life of a chronic relapser isn't living.

What and who guided you toward an addiction free journey?

My friend Lara had been in an accident which resulted in her being on life support which later became hospice. I saw her the day before they removed her life support, I knew what I saw was going to change me forever that I promised that day that the next day I would have my last drink and never drink again. As an alcoholic with a 40 to 60 percent chance of relapsing , as much as she defied the odds in the end, my plan is to beat the odds as well

What plan and steps did you take to get out of addiction?

I knew I was an alcoholic for a long time , much longer than I'd like to admit , but i didn't have a plan. I knew the games I was playing with my drinking was a very dangerous game of Russian Roulette after that last drink I was either going to get back on the wagon or plummet further. My plan was to be as honest as possible, I am public about my recovery because it forces me to be honest because people are paying more attention than I thought.

What was at stake for you if you didn’t take these actions to get sober?

the day my friend Lara was taken off life support it made me realize how much I wanted to really live.

For someone in the same situation as you were who wants to get clean, what would you want to tell them?

if I continued my daughters wouldn't know their mother. I'd be homeless, unemployed, and further alienated from people for my toxic behavior that there are tools to improve. You can't just rage it away , think rehab or a sponsor is going to take it away. It is possible, it all just depends on how badly you want it.

Maureen is a cubicle warrior by day and stand up comedian by night. Follow her big adventure on Instagram @the_ginger_fury

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